February 15, 2009

valentine's weekend

I hate valentine's day. and i think that i might, just maybe, hate my life.

nothing's going right, and nothing probably ever will. yes me. me poor me, drowning in self pitty. but honestly, i don't care. all day i've been just laying here. crying sleeping and feeling shitty. what's new?! I mean really. is this EVER gonna end? because it's getting terribly old. always feeling bad, always wanting it more.

i'm sick of a large majority of the people in my school. so many people are annoying rude and are just not very nice people in general.I'm also sick of people telling me who i can and who i can't hang out with. and what's making me the most upset is that i'm actually starting to believe what they're saying. and i don't want to believe it, i don't want to think like them.but for some bloody reason, it's starting to get to me.

i like lily allen.

god, please help me. please make this hell end NOW. i've lost all motivation to go on. i can't even make myself shower any more. i always feel tired.

i wish i hadn't bought into all these lies. but maybe, even if i hadn't, i would still feel this way. i'm afraid that this will never get resolved. that you'll never want to listen. that this will never have a happy ending.and if this happens, how will i deal with it. how will i be able to accept it??how, oh how will i ever be able to?


Posted on 02/15/2009 9:00 PM Comments (0)
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Hanna Beth
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